a lesson in self-control

The other day at work one of my girls said to me, 

"Your Uggs are fake. I can tell because the Uggs brand doesn't make them that color."

{Note: My fake Uggs are tan.}

I wish that you could hear the mean and rude tone of voice she used.

In my head, my initial response is not so pleasant.

I just want to say, 

"Only b*tchy, entitled people take the time to notice the subtle difference in the shade of tan between 'real' and 'fake' Uggs." 

Because, what does it matter if my boots are fake? 

They are warm and they do the job.

So I paid half the price for the same value?

That makes me awesome! 

But instead I took a half step to pause and think about the right way to respond.

So then we had a conversation about how I don't have a lot of money to be throwing around at expensive shoes, and even if I did, I would probably choose to spend it on more worthwhile things.

We talked about how pointing out people's 'fake' shoes could be hurtful because it is commentary on their monetary value and, honestly, the value of a human being is not monetary. 

And it was a good moment for us.

I think I learned a lot more than she did.

I remembered the importance of self-control. 

That the gratifying moment of calling someone a mean name is not lasting.

But healthy human relationships are.

If my response had been less than kind, my relationship with this girl would have suffered.

***

A few years ago my brother and I were helping a friend do some gardening.

She had just had a little boy.

She was nervous about raising a boy.

So she asked my brother what the most important thing she needed to teach this little guy.

My brother thought for a minute.

"Self-control."

And I got chills.

Some things are just true.

And truth always touches my heart.

And it rushed through my brain all the millions of ways that self-control would be of importance.

in accomplishing difficult tasks, in working a job to provide for a family, in gaining an education, in always treating women with respect and kindness, in raising children, in avoiding pornography and immorality, in being a good friend, in living the gospel. 

So, self-control.